Wednesday, 23 September 2009


Word up Extreem Fans!

News has filtered through that a number of weeks ago saw the unity of science and wood rolling in a clash that could only be described as SKAENCE!

Bringing the HEAT like a Bunsen Burner the EDUSKATER™ Team arrived at ST.GEORGIES roller board and SCOOTER-X rink to excite and educate the 'YOOT' that science is in fact the FUTURE.

First off the mark to IGNITE the youngsters minds was the eminant Molecular Physisist Dr Jōseph Harbgōōde of the Physik-Institut UZH. Using his superior intellect combined with his RADICLE PARTICLE PRINCIPLES™ Dr Jōseph became a metaphysical Quark shooting through the electron field of a atom and attempting to escape the negative charge holding it to its orbit, the KIDS were amazed that just by watching some old dude roll around some bowls they could understand the inner workings of the universe at a subatomic level! ATOMIC!

Aled Joenes


Next up was the noted genetisist Dr. B. Bob from the institute of Genetics and Molecular Medicine, as ever the Dr. was on a mission to solve the genetic riddles that plague mankind, via the medium of rollerboarding Dr.B demonstrated the causality of photonic interference on DNA structure which causes mutation and incorrect protein sequencing by BLASTING the metaphysical DNA strand with his metaphysical photon of pure THANE!

Push Grinder


By now the kids were hooked and were filled with important scientific questions such as 'Are you sure you should be doing that at your age?' and 'Careful grandad, do you need help with getting out of the bowl?'

The noted Astrophysist and super teacher Mr. L. Poulet was ready to RIP and tell the kids about space travel and the difficulties of leaving this fair planet we call home, his incredible teaching skills where put to full use as he WOWED the considerable gathering of children biting at the bit in order to LEARN from they're wise elder by BLASTING into ORBIT with a SICK turny grabber. The children instantly understood the intricacies of that RAD bloke Newton and his third law along with escape velocities and moving in a vacuum!

Drumstick Turner


That my friends is where the lesson ends, the scientists packed up thier bags and headed for the Large Hadron Collider to continue thier ground breaking studies into the machinations of the universe via the medium of Xtreem sports!

Note: Since this article was published it has be disclosed to the press that during a particularly SWEET session rolling planking within the Large Hadron Collider (it happens to be a massive full pipe), an unknown employee accidently activated the machine and all members of the EDUSKATER™ team where instantly converted into plasma. Its is possible that they now exist on a higher realm and continue to RIDE through the temporary inhabitation of mere mortals to continue to spead the word that RAD doesn't have to be RETARDED!

Until next time my learned X-T-Reem fans KEEP THE DREAM XTREEEM!

Friday, 26 June 2009

Hella Fresh Crew Liberate locals!

Last Wednesday saw members of the underground skate ANARCHIST group THE HELLA FRESH CREW decend upon the newly refurbished DAME EMELAY downhill roller action arena and LAY WASTE to the concrete conundrum by dropping BOMBS all over the place!

Little is known about this tight knit crew apart from the fact that if they hit up your town for a session, that session will uplift the proletariat and overthrow the bourgeois supremists regime that is shackling the working class into a life of subserviant obedience! It was no surprise then that almost as soon as the HFC appeared at the DAMER (as the locals call it) shit was gonna be POLITICAL YO!

Onlookers were astounded by the skill that these FREEDOM FIGHTERS displayed, performing various jumps, some at least 3ft high, with apparently nothing attaching them to their 4 wheeled trays apart from they're left wing agenda!

The team set they're sights on conquering the newly refurbished smooth uppity bit into a steep wall like structure with some metal plating on the top.
It didn't take long before Deva the Tac* LIBERATED an amazing up to the top twist the wrong way axle stopper and back the way you came-er from his bag of SOCIALIST LITERATURE and HOT roller boarding trickery!
bring the storm
KARL MARX Salutes you!

Hiding his features from the onlooking CCTV network with a HUGE BEARD, Juses Guavara* the supposid love child of Che Guavara and Evita took up the challenge to FREE THE MINDS of the repressed youth with this amazing back axle toucher!
touchy touchy
Your (alledged) Dad would be Proud!

Obviously the display was having the desired effect as the local inhabitants had already gathered into a large frenzied group and where preparing to march on council offices to demand their rights as citizens, two of the HFC, Deva the Tac and Jymmi The Jemas*, took the opportunity to remind the baying mob that VIOLENCE is not the answer with DEMOCRATIC DOUBLE front of the board slipper up the wedgy grinder!
Doppleganger banger

The mob was instantly pacified, but having the political fires stoked in their hearts marched off bearing the positive socialist message of freedom for the Masses and free dental care for all! POLITICS AT WORK!
Knowing that their work was done the HFC quickly dissappeared before the supressive Capitalist Authorites arrived, like ghosts they were gone!
Until Next time XTREEM FANS


* Names have been changed to protect the HFC from ongoing investigations into their activities.

Wednesday, 3 June 2009

Frontside is back!

YES you read right, the frontside boardslide blog is back online Xtreem fans, 7 LONG months of intensive cybergenic reconditioning therapy to an ankle that was dubbed the SILENT WITNESS after one of the most horrific BAILS ever witnessed, your intrepid reporter is back on a board and back on the blog! BIG UP!

Feeling stronger than the BIONIC man, a ONE MAN demolition session was laid DOWN at the newly opened concrete skateboard nirvana that is Glastonbury roller derby course, that man had left by the time frontside got there but the local kids where already HYPED TO THE MAX with what they had presumably witnessed!

The layout of the park is what every xtreem sports fan would want, grinder boxes, slider railings, wedgies and roller bumps of all type were presented on entering the gates. The session was already ON and some SICK wooden toy skills were being thrown down like the gaunlet of the jilted knight KING ARTHER in times of old HAVE THAT LANCELOTT!

Check this shit out, MAD 180 turn board flip on the half tube section of the park!
Frontside Flipper


Some of the LOCAL roller boarders where setting the park ON FIRE with some exquisite displays of 4 wheeled ALCHEMY ever seen in the land of wizards and warlocks, I reckon some of these kids must have been decendents of MERLIN as they had some seriously magic skills under they're funny cloth hats.. check out Sir Rich's front of the board and axle slide grind up the wedgy grinder.

Rich- Krooks

The mystic forces of the Tor Laylines where at force on the day as travellers from afar turned up, drawn by the vibes of newly waxed edgers.
The magic was strong as this perfect boardslap turnback trick was laid down by the Mighty Faye the SLAYER.

Faye- Frock2

The session continued and the sun set on King Arthers kingdom, ale was drunk and much merriment was made so until next time xtreeem sports fans


Wednesday, 12 November 2008

SKATE action in CRAZY European Skate Tour!

HOLY MOLEY! This week saw the THE CREAM OF THE XTREEM travelling on an intrepid SKATERPLANKING tour into the little known EU member state WALES!!!
North of France and East of Ireland, Wales is a sparcely populated country but due to very forward thinking artists and architects has been transformed into a self styled SKATE UTOPIA, the chance to experience the vibrancy and culture of such a country could not be missed!

Following our guide we made our way to the bustling city KNEW PORTH and to a SECRET UNDERGROUND wooden WONDERLAND just ready for severe SHRALPAGE! (we ain't gonna tell you where it is kids as it looked totally ILLEGAL!)

This place had everything a THANE RIPPER needed to satisfy they're THANE ADDICTION with arial ramps, grinder boxes and roller bumps of all kinds! KILLER!

BOB BO BIDDLY BO got to business straight away with a text book styled out TRUCK N BOARD SLIDER! Check that Kid in the backround! HE WAS LOVING IT!

By now a HUGE crowd had gathered

and witnessed the MADDENING SICKNESS of the XTREEM TEAM DISPLAY TEAM DOUBLE SLIDER that literally made the local kids go MAD......LITERALLY!

Some other CRAZY Stuff was going down on the other side of the park but no one was there to witness it so we can't say what it was, but you can bet that it was RIPPING!

Habgoose moved on to the more techical area of the skateboard course and mavelled at the build quality by sticking the RADDEST Jump to Wobbly Wall Roller trick like the PRO that he is! GOOD ON YA HABGOOSE!

Thats it for now GNAR FOLLOWERS, remember to keep the DREAM XTREEEM!

Saturday, 1 November 2008


Some, well actually one, of the UK's top BOWL riding legends suprised and EXCITED at least two local children who where not entirely indifferent to the CRAZY FOUR WHEELED ACTION put down on saturday morning at the all new Filton mud wrestling and action sports arena!

Joe Habgoose astounded onlookers as he rolled his way round the concrete skateboarding course REALLY FAST and LAUNCHED himself into the air even using his hands to grip the board! MENTAL!

Along side Joe, a host of notible riders from throughout the southwest came along to LAY down some seriously GNARLY STEEZ as the session began to HEAT up in the BARELY ABOVE FREEZING temperatures!

A young ripper, Frank, formally a Gangbanger and drug dealer from TOTTERDOWN, showed how he has managed to turn his life around with the help of his love of the LORD JESUS CHRIST and ACTIONSPORTS to become one of THE up and commers of the UK skate scene representing in fine style. Here he is SLAYING his demons on the street course with his SLIDING DOWN THE RAIL DOGMA! ... PRAISE BE!

The half-man half-roastdinner known as Poulet layed some serious BIZNESS down in the bowl with the smoothest wheely grinders ever seen that morning while managing to fulfill his obligations as a part-time hair model.

Taking some time from his current UK tour, the dixie star Bob Bobbington III plucked a nice little pivot from his ever expanding list of BOARD WIZARDRY to silence the doubters that Banjo Picking legends can't lay it down when its needs laying down YEEEEEHAAAH!

The session continued and sweet skateboarding went down, tricks were landed such as ARIALS, GRINDERS and other stuff which was RAD. FATHERS skated with SONS and SONS snaked FATHERS and everyone had a very lovely time and coffee was drunk from thermos flasks. DOPE!

Until Next time X-TEEE-REEEEM Fans!

Wednesday, 22 October 2008

INSANE Session goes down at Skate MECCA Hengrove!

Yes Yes, another HOT skate session went down tonight at the grove with the usual suspects attending, and some students, and a school kid, and a couple of kids who I presume go to college or something but I can't be sure.

The C&W Great Bob Bo Bobby chewing the fat with Pete Doherty

However, as with any skate session at the hollowed ground of hengrove the session went ORF!

Some CRAZY stunts were laid down by the country and western star Bo Bob Bobbington III such as the DOPE tail skidder thing below!

Styled Out

Even Pete Doherty took time out from his heavy schedule of methadone replacement therapy and dyeing his hair ginger to SHOCK us all with some MAD WOODEN TOY SKILLZ:

Smith Stall


Everyone else skated to the best of their abilities and should also be applauded and deserved to buy themselves a beer (well the adults anyway, and I guess the students might buy some cider or tesco's value lager and some rolling tobacco etc etc, oh and I supposed the school childen can have a curly wurly and a ribena, but only if they brush they're teeth afterwards.)

Friday, 26 September 2008

CRAZY Street session last night!

Yes yes, the time and the place was set for what could only be described as a 'street skate'. Skaters from around the south west gathered at the hollowed skatetopia that was 'the back of Jims office' and set about SHREDDING everything in sight!

First up was some MAD wheely action by the Skate LEGEND Gwildore along the LONGEST Manny pad anyone had seen (in that particular road), not stopping there, Gwildore ROCKED a CRAZY baskside 180 from the road onto the pavement, it was so GNARLY that a passing office worker almost shat his pants! PERRRRP!

We missioned it to the next spot where some student kid who was tagging along did the SICKEST rock n roll on the SICKEST STEEP BANK covered in SICK, the whole CREW instantly BLEW CHUNKS at the SICKNESS coz it was SO SICK!

The CHICKEN LEGGED FREAK they call POULET turned up and used his magic TWEED TRILBY hat wearing STEEZ to ride UP and then DOWN the flatbank with the apparent ease of someone who doesn't have drumsticks for limbs..CRAZY.

The red brick banks in town where the next spot to be hit with everyone KILLING it by rolling up and down and doing some tricks and stuff, it was RAD and the local office workers could bearly believe that this level of skateboarding was happening right infront of their office windows!

A couple of FIXIE PIXIES turned up to see what the commotion was all about and gave MAD PROPS to the POSSE by doing a WHEELIE AND SKID display! FRESH!

Loads more spots were hit up and loads of security guards earned they're money by doing they're best BIG DADDY or GIANT HAYSTACKS impressions behind the big glass doors of office buildings.. EASY! EASY! EASY!

All in all the STREET SKATE was regarded by all as the RADDEST street session to go down in the last week at least. SKATE AND DESTROY!